Is the Birth Battle of Today Similar to the Breastfeeding Battle of Yesterday?

I was talking to my mom yesterday and the conversation turned to birth and breastfeeding. She said something about how I am so passionate about birth and yet her passion is still for breastfeeding. Now, of course I am pro-breastfeeding, but it got me thinking about why I am *so passionate* about birth while she remains much more passionate about breastfeeding, even years after she nursed her kids. I'm wondering if it because I am able to reap the rewards of the battles that she and her generation fought for breastfeeding, while I am fighting the battles of my generation over birth.

By today's standards, no one doubts the superiority of breastmilk over baby formula. Ask any pediatrician who follows the American Academy of Pediatrics recommendations on what is the best food for your newborn baby and they will quote verbatim "the AAP recommends that breastmilk is the best food for your baby through the first year of life." Of course, they get less supportive once you've hit that first birthday, but that's another topic for another day. However, that supportive position towards breastfeeding wasn't always there.

Imagine with me. A young woman learns she is expecting. Although she and all of her siblings were fed formula, she has heard from friends that breastmilk is actually better for her baby. She does lots of research which completely supports this position and she continues reading everything she can get her hands on to do everything possible to ensure breastfeeding gets off to a good start. When she informs her doctor of her plans to breastfeed, a patronizing look comes over his face. "Oh this silly girl," his eyes seem to say, "why doesn't she realize that medical technology has created a better milk?" He may even try to convince her of all the reasons why feeding a baby formula is so much more convenient and easy. "Just think," he says, "you'll be able to go out with your friends and not be tied down at home to that baby......it's liberation! Isn't that what the girls these days want anyway?" Imagine if that woman tries to breastfeed, but with no support from anyone she knows, when problems arise she has nowhere to turn and after shedding some tears, reaches for the can of formula. As that woman grieves the loss of her body's ability to make milk and nourish her baby, well-meaning friends and family try to cheer her up by saying things like, "look at that baby......she's completely perfect and healthy......why get all upset over what type of food to give to her; just be glad you have a healthy baby....." Is any of this starting to sound familiar?

I have no idea if those were actual arguments used in support of formula-feeding. Because I live in a time when breastfeeding is generally supported, its hard to imagine a time when "the professionals" were spouting advice that is 180 degrees opposite of what it is now.

Today we don't have to fight the breastfeeding battles of yesterday, but we do have almost the same battles in childbirth. Women who want to have a natural childbirth, do their research and present it to their doctor often times are laughed at, ridiculed and patronized. Who am *I* to question the decision-making ability of someone who went to medical school and has delivered babies for "x" number of years? Do I think I'm *better* than someone else for wanting something different? If it was good enough for so-and-so, why isn't it good enough for me? When our desires to avoid inductions, drugs and machines are compromised and we end up with much more of a medicalized birth than what we had hoped for and dreamed of we are (in essence) told we are selfish to mourn our natural childbirth.....after all, our baby is healthy.....isn't that all that matters?

Looking to the future, I hope history repeats itself and the next generation will look to us with thankful hearts for the battles we fought (and won!) for them. I hope my daughter (and my sons' wives) have more choices in childbirth. I hope they look back at women who were refused food, refused a tub to ease labor pain, drugged up and were hooked up with wires to machines and think "wow! how archaic! I'm glad I don't have to go through that!" Even if they take their birthing freedoms for granted, I'll be happy, knowing I was part of the generation that paved the way!

I heart Lindsey Meehleis!

This video is inspiring! Watching it, I wonder....is this my path? I don't know if I yet have the courage to go forward toward being a doula, childbirth educator or whatever God has in store for me, but its exciting to watch other women achieving that goal and I love living vicariously through them.

My Journey to a VBAC from Lindsey Meehleis on Vimeo.

Timing

The past couple of days have been amazing. Reading The Christian Childbirth Handbook and The Nurturing Touch at Birth have really put an excitement in my heart for becoming a doula. However, I'm really struggling right now with the timing of it all. With everything else going on in my life, can I really add something else that will eat up my time? Will my children suffer if I'm gone even more at births? What about my marriage? I've already decided that when I do this it will be on a very limited basis....maybe one to two births per month. Also, I feel very strongly that this needs to be a ministry, not a business and I am currently working a retail job in the evenings once my husband is home to watch the kids, which doesn't mesh well with the unpredictibility of birth. Women will need me to commit to being available for them but I also want to be of good character at work and not start missing work all the time because I'm at a birth. So, it creates a bit of a quandry for me and I'm trying to figure out if God wants me to get all the details worked out first or if he wants me to step out in faith and trust him to work out all the details. Of course I want to trust him, but I also want to be responsible and not damage my reputation at my current job.

Excerpts from "The Christian Childbirth Handbook"

I'm so excited! UPS just dropped off the first of two books I ordered from Amazon last week. I'm glad that Cade is napping (and Gavin and Alayna are at school right now) which gives me the perfect chance to thumb through this book. My first impressions are "This book is amazing!" I've already fallen in love with "Christ Centered Childbirth" by Kelly Townsend and I've been really excited to dig into this one as well. What I really respect about it is that really follows an "everything is permissible but not everything is beneficial" format which (of course) is very biblical. I'm hoping to use both books (Christ Centered Childbirth and Christian Childbirth Handbook) in my future doula ministry. What will be a challenge for me is to support and advocate for women during pregnancy without "coloring" them with my own personal beliefs about natural childbirth. Here's some excerpts to demonstrate what I mean:

Though the Bible gives us standards and principles, there is very little in the way of 'Thou Shalt Not' when it comes to giving birth. It is probably no surprise to you that families can read the same Bible and believe they are called to different actions. Listed here are some of the most common debates in Christian childbirth with the Biblical reasoning given from each side....Be willing to explore both sides of each issue, searching the Bible for clear understanding. When you are done, God may have given you a new outlook on a topic you thought you understood, or he may have strengthened your faith in things you already believed......

Is Childbirth Supposed to be Painful?
Yes: Pain in childbirth is a consequence of the first sin. (Gen. 3:16)
No: I have been redeemed. I am not under the curse and so do not have to suffer the consequences as they pertained to giving birth. (Galationas 3:13)

(More examples given...I just picked one point each for "yes" and "no")

Should a Christian plan to use pain medication?
Yes: My faith and freedom in Christ allows me to use medication in labor. (Romans 14:1-4)
No: I want to use wisdom and discernment to make sure I only resort to medications if they are medically necessary so I do not add risk to the health of my baby or mine. I will not plan to use them because I am afraid. Instead, I'll let God strengthen me. (Galatians 5:13, 2 Tim. 1:7)

And it goes on with headings such as "Stewardship of Good Nutrition", "Spiritually Healthy Pregnancy" and "Making Positive Lifestyle Changes" before it gets into the nitty gritty with the stages of labor, birth planning and dealing with labor challenges.

I am so excited to read this book cover-to-cover....it looks very thorough in the topics it covers and its so refreshing to read it from a Christian worldview.